1. I look at people sometimes and think… Really??? That’s the sperm that won.
2. When I die, I want my grave to offer free Wifi so that people visit more often.
3. I love food and sleep. If I give you a bit of food or text you all night, that means something.
4. Diets are hard because I get hungry.
5. We live in the era of smartphones and stupid peoples.
6. Just saw the most smartest person when I was in front of the mirror.
7. God is really creative, I mean…just look at m!!!
8. I’m not lazy, I’m just on my energy saving mode.
9. Please be patient even a toilet can handle only one ass hole at a time.
10. Whenever i have a problem, I just sing, Then i realize my voice is worse than my problem.
11. When I’m on my death bed, I want my final words to be “I left one million dollars in the…
12. I always learn from mistake of others who take my advice.
13. “F#%K It.” – my final thought before making most decisions.
14. If I delete your number, you’re basically deleted from my life.
15. Some people need to open their small minds instead of their big mouths.
16. Whenever I think of quit smoking, I need a cigarette to think.
17. Relation of friendship is greater then the relation of blood.
18. When I miss you I re-read our old conversations and smile like an idiot.
19. When I miss you it seems every song I listen to is about you.
20. My silence/smile is just another word for my pain.
21. Sometimes It’s better to be alone…No one can hurt you.
22. The most painful goodbye’s are those which were never said and never explained.
23. Sometimes one middle finger isn’t enough to let someone know how you feel. That’s why you have two hands.
24. Sometimes I’m not angry, I’m hurt and there’s a big difference.
25. My silence doesn’t mean that I quit… It simply means that I don’t want to argue with people who just don’t want to understand!
26. Don’t be so happy, I don’t really forgive people, I just pretend like it’s okay and wait for my turn to destroy them.
27. If you want to make your dreams come true, The first thing you have to do is wake up.
28. I don’t have dirty mind, I have sexy imagination.
29. The greatest advantage of speaking the truth is that you don’t have to remember what you said.
30. I’m not failed… my success is just postponed.
31. Everyday is a second chance.
32. If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door.
33. Do not give up, the beginning is always the hardest.
34. The only way to do great work is to love what you do.
35. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.
36. You have to learn the rules of the game. And then you have to play better than anyone else.
37. Life is like riding a bicycle to keep your balance, you must keep moving.
38. You’re already a successful personal. The things we take for granted someone else is praying for.
39. Dreams is not what you see in sleep, Is the thing which doesn’t let you sleep.
40. I will win, not immediately but definitely.
41. Had a really great “Night Out” last night, according to my police report.
42. The road to success is always under construction.
43. Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will.
44. Born to express not to impress.
45. Silent people have the loudest minds.
46. When I was born. Devil said,”Oh Shit! Competition!!!”
47. I work for money, for loyalty hire a Dog.
48. Some people are alive only, because it’s illegal to kill them.
49. When nothing goes right… Go left!
50. If you can’t convince them, confuse them.
51. I love to walk in fog, because nobody knows I’m smoking.
52. I’m not drunk, I’m just chemically off-balanced.
53. Oh, so you wanna argue, bring it. I got my CAPS LOCK ON.
54. I’m so poor that I can’t pay attention in class.
55. Warning!!! I know KARATE and few other oriental words.
56. I’m not virgin, my life fucks me everyday.
57. I talk to myself because I like dealing with a better class of people.
58. Save water drink beer.
59. Virginity is not dignity, It is just lack of opportunity.
60. Not all men are fools, some stay bachelor.
61. Phones are better than girlfriends, at least we can switch off.
62. I love my job only when I’m on vacation
63. Friends come and go, but enemies remain and build up.
64. Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.
65. In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.
66. How is a poor man a lot like a rich man? they both have an iPhone.
67. Some people call me Mike, you can call me tonight.
68. Sometimes you succeed and other times you learn.
69. I always dream of being a millionaire like my uncle… He’s dreaming too.
70. Scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ who I am!
71. My “last seen at” was just to check your “last seen at”.
72. Not always “Available”.. try your Luck..
73. Hey there Whatsapp is using me.
74. Life is Short – Chat Fast!
75. Time is precious, waste it wisely.
76. I’m not single, I’m just romantically challenged.
77. Trust in God, But lock your car.
78. AwesoME ends with ME and Ugly starts with You.
79. Try to be a rainbow in someone’s cloud.
80. It hurts when you have someone in your heart but not in your arms.
81. Please don’t forget to smile :)
82. Get up every morning, imagine a future then make it happen.
83. Everyone is beautiful in their own way because God makes no mistakes.
84. You’re right. I’m NOT perfect. But I’m unique!
85. Always remember that you’re unique. Just like everyone else.
86. Don’t compare yourself with anyone in this world… if you do so, you are insulting yourself…
87. Create your own visual style… let it be unique for yourself and yet identifiable for others.
88. Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.
89. It is almost impossible to smile on the outside without feeling better on the inside.
90. No matter how strong of a person you are, there’s always someone who can make you weak.
91. It’s funny how people say they miss you, but don’t even make an effort to see you.
92. Life is like Facebook. People will like your problems & comment on them but no one’s gonna solve them because everyone is busy in updating their.
93. Attitude is like underwear Don’t show it just wore it…
94. I Am Not Special , I Am Just Limited Edition :P
95. I got less but I got best!
96. Get as rude as possible and don’t let anyone tell you how to live.
97. The only reason I am fat is because a tiny body couldn’t store all this personality.
98. Adjustment with right people is always better than Argument with wrong people. A meaningful silence is always better than meaningless words.
99. If a hug tell how much I love you, I would hold you in my arms forever.
100. Silence is the most powerful scream…